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Post by Jooyoung on Oct 25, 2015 9:18:17 GMT
In the novel, Don Quixote seem to wish for the best, but often bring about the worst. For example, he stopped the rich farmer from beating up the boy and commanded the farmer to pay the boy, all wishing for the best of the boy. However, in the end, the boy was beaten up more severely and then abandoned by the master after Don Quixote left. I find this very relatable.. sometimes when I try to help someone, I end up harming that person. For example, I kept secret about my brother playing games from my mother because I, too, play sometimes (gaming is banned at my house  (.. ) However, my brother eventually was caught and grounded by mom because he took advantage of the fact that I would not tell on mom and played even more often. Have you guys experience the same? Have you tried to help someone but end up harming that person? |
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Post by Jonathan on Oct 25, 2015 10:25:03 GMT
The fact that doing your best brings negative consequences is really ironic. For example in basketball, I would play defense and if someone needs help go help him. However, this would leave the opponent open and give a chance for the other team to score. If the defense succeeds, there isn't much of a problem. The problem is when it fails and the other team scores. I tried to help but in the end the opponent team scores.
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Post by lucia on Oct 25, 2015 11:07:57 GMT
I agree! While reading Don Quixote, I started to feel like intentions dont matter, but outcomes do, like in real life. We all have had the experience of lying to protect something like our reputation or relationships with others. But when things don't turn out the way the way we expect because of our lies, we're the guilty ones, as we all tend to look for someone to blame. Our intentions will get misunderstood. And because individuals have different needs and wants (due to maybe cultural divide), what is good or bad for someone is not necessarily good or bad for another. This is why intentions are flawed.
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Post by ETypeRegymon on Oct 25, 2015 13:21:29 GMT
In recent memory, I don't think I help other people that often unless they ask me because I'm afraid that this will happen. It's kind of like being an unintentional hypocrite (what the person says doesn't match up with their actions, basically). No one likes a hypocrite since they're essentially a giant ball of lies, but making the problem worse while intending to help can make that treatment happen even though it wasn't your intention. In fact, you were trying to do the opposite of that, but humans aren't perfect. With that, it becomes difficult to try helping if you're afraid to fail.
Though for Quixote, any failed intention he does is because of his delusions, which causes him to not understand how the world around him works. His intentions were clear and he acted upon it (that helping the boy scene wouldn't end horribly for the boy if it was a fairy tale), but Quixote doesn't realize not everyone in the world is simply good. (That farmer has little morals, and Quixote doesn't stay to watch him make up for the bad things the farmer had done, so he just kept on doing it because Quixote wasn't there to stop him.)
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Post by timmy on Oct 25, 2015 14:52:04 GMT
People constantly say that we should help those in need. However, I would say it is best to let things be if it is not your own business. Even if you meddle with a case, you are not a God, and you are bound to make mistake and have blind spots in the process. In the result, the outcome may turn beneficial or harmful. But the truth is, either way, it is not going to affect you. I believe this is a law of nature to let things be.
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sunnyp
Junior Member
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Post by sunnyp on Oct 25, 2015 14:54:13 GMT
I cannot recall any specific event where I failed to help someone by actually harming that but I'm pretty sure i did sometime. This usually happens when someone tries to help only thinking about themselves. They have good intentions but they didn't think far enough that they don't realise it is not really helpful for the help receivers. For example, you see people walking around the street holding signs that says "go to church or else you goto hell" their intention is to help us by telling us, but they are not exactly helping us.
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Post by toomuchchanmin on Nov 1, 2015 11:25:35 GMT
There is this famous saying in Europe: "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." Also there is the quote from the movie Juruncoolic Park: "Some of the worst things imaginable have been done with the best intentions."
I can't remember a good event in my life, but I know a really good happening in history that had good intentions but had terrible outcomes. It was the Prohibition Era of the 1920s. The US government banned drinking as a whole to make the society healthier, but what ended up was the rise of organized crime called mafias. The mafia earned money by shipping illegal liquor to the wide muncool. The mafia would be strong even until the 1960s, so as you can see, it is true good intentions sometimes lead to bad stuff.
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Post by mayurika98 on Nov 1, 2015 13:33:55 GMT
I also encountered this thought while reading Don Quixote. Even though his actions lead to the boy being even more beaten up he didn't mean for any of that to happen. His intentions cannot be understood on our level because he is in a totally different world. This relates to empathy because Don Quixote is trying to do is feel empathy for the boy and trying to help him out of his bad situation. One time my brother asked for my help with a geometry question and I taught him a method from what I had in my knowledge. It turns out the method he learned in school was different from what I learned in my experience. Sometimes, its hard to attain advice from someone older because it is harder to relate to an older or younger.
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toufiq
Junior Member
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Post by toufiq on Nov 1, 2015 14:35:31 GMT
I can relate to it too. It's sad isn't it? When you're trying to help someone but make their situation even worse. Cheating in the exam is one way we can think about it. We may help each other by thinking that we are being great friends but actually we are ruining both of our potential. We do these things by looking at the short term goods it brings to us, overlooking the long term damaged.
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Post by Emily on Nov 7, 2015 15:17:53 GMT
I think that it is a very sad thing to see that when you try to help someone, you end up doing worse by helping them. A few years ago, I puncooled by a homeless person and felt sorry looking at him, and so I gave hime some money. However, after I gave him the money I saw him enter a convenience store and come out carrying a pack of cigarettes. I felt so down by this because I expected him to buy food or something warm to wear, something that would help him survive another day, but instead he bought a pack of cigs which are even worse for his health. But we should all know that this is not always the case, so always keep donating to people who are less fortunate than us.  |
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Post by melody on Nov 8, 2015 4:39:30 GMT
This happens all the time to me! I always feel sorry for the people I help because I end up giving them more stress.
Just a week after I came to Korea, a foreign couple came up to me in Myeong-dong and asked for the direction. So I did, and eventually I figured that I've told the wrong direction which was totally the opposite way of their destination. I panicked but, I was too late.
After like 3 hours, I met them again on a random street. As soon as I recognized their faces I ran away because I had nothing to say.
Not only this, but I help my mom doing the chores but end up breaking at least a cup or ripping off the carpet or something.
So my mom said that I'm helping my best when I am not helping her.
After I figured that I'm useless, when people ask me directions, for places I'm not pretty sure I say "I don't know" and run away.
It's hard for me to help other people which really help them a lot.
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(.. ) However, my brother eventually was caught and grounded by mom because he took advantage of the fact that I would not tell on mom and played even more often. 
